TV Guide GOLD Monday

Joe and Chas have been together for nine years, a long time to be truly in love with someone. But how long does it take to properly say goodbye? Darkly comic tale, written by and starring Steve Pemberton and Reece Shearsmith, with a guest appearance from Sheila Reid

Del spots another sure-fire winner and decides to enter the highly profitable tourist trade - and with Rodney and Grandad backing him 100 per cent, he is sure his open-top bus tour initiative will be a massive success. Vintage comedy, starring David Jason, Nicholas Lyndhurst and Lennard Pearce

Fletch desperately wants to get out of the tedious task of making fishing nets, and hatches a crafty scheme to get himself assigned to the library. Classic comedy, starring Ronnie Barker

The local mayor becomes embroiled in a sex scandal, so Boycie decides to stand for election as his replacement - unaware Llewellyn is planning to do the same. Marlene is put in a tight spot when a schoolfriend of Tyler's confesses he has developed feelings for her. John Challis and Sue Holderness star

Del-Boy acquires three tons of lead sheeting, which turns out to be a DIY nuclear fallout shelter, so he, Rodney and Grandad collect their sleeping bags and food and have a practice run to make sure they will know what to do if the Russians attack

After complaining about their long wait for lunch in the canteen, the staff are told to take over the kitchens themselves - but when they arrive for their shift, they find the area unhygienic. Comedy, starring Mollie Sugden, John Inman and Frank Thornton

Fletch desperately wants to get out of the tedious task of making fishing nets, and hatches a crafty scheme to get himself assigned to the library. Classic comedy, starring Ronnie Barker

Hyacinth attends an exclusive auction, while Daisy and Rose try to cool the ardour of a woman who seems determined to marry Daddy. Comedy, starring Patricia Routledge, Judy Cornwell and Josephine Tewson

Barry's promotion at the building society gives him a headache when he has to visit a particularly violent family - and he naively asks Clegg and Truly for advice. Long-running comedy from the pen of Roy Clarke, starring Peter Sallis, Frank Thornton and Mike Grady

The local mayor becomes embroiled in a sex scandal, so Boycie decides to stand for election as his replacement - unaware Llewellyn is planning to do the same. Marlene is put in a tight spot when a schoolfriend of Tyler's confesses he has developed feelings for her. John Challis and Sue Holderness star

The Eastgate branch of the bank finds itself in urgent need of a new manager - and who should step into the breach but Sergeant Wilson. His new life does not last long, however, as his place of work is bombed the day he arrives. Comedy first shown in 1970, starring John Le Mesurier

The officers are elated to learn Gasforth FC have made it to the next round of the FA Cup in a match they're going to have to police. Grim wastes no time toughening up his men for a possible confrontation with hooligans, much to the distress of Fowler, who believes he's in line for an MBE if he manages to avoid trouble. Comedy, starring Rowan Atkinson, David Haig and Mark Addy

After complaining about their long wait for lunch in the canteen, the staff are told to take over the kitchens themselves - but when they arrive for their shift, they find the area unhygienic. Comedy, starring Mollie Sugden, John Inman and Frank Thornton

Fletch desperately wants to get out of the tedious task of making fishing nets, and hatches a crafty scheme to get himself assigned to the library. Classic comedy, starring Ronnie Barker

The Eastgate branch of the bank finds itself in urgent need of a new manager - and who should step into the breach but Sergeant Wilson. His new life does not last long, however, as his place of work is bombed the day he arrives. Comedy first shown in 1970, starring John Le Mesurier

Barry's promotion at the building society gives him a headache when he has to visit a particularly violent family - and he naively asks Clegg and Truly for advice. Long-running comedy from the pen of Roy Clarke, starring Peter Sallis, Frank Thornton and Mike Grady

Tony worries Bren will be distracted during her TV debut. Stan hopes for a proposal and Dolly is so upset at the design of the new uniforms that she considers drastic action. Comedy, starring Victoria Wood and Thelma Barlow

Norman the breadman fails to deliver, the stripper cannot play the accordion and Jean has bridesmaids' knickers on her mind. First episode of the canteen comedy, starring Victoria Wood, Julie Walters and Celia Imrie

Lucy announces to the friends that she is pregnant, causing Lee to wonder if he is the father. Comedy, starring Lee Mack as a man with a complicated relationship with his flatmate. With Sally Bretton, Tim Vine and Miranda Hart

Outspoken funnyman Frankie Boyle hosts an evening of stand-up at the Apollo in Hammersmith, London, treating the audience to his own brand of humour before handing over to the acerbic Simon Evans and actress/stand-up Aisling Bea

Alison finds herself hounded by the ghosts, who now realise she can both see and hear them, and tries to ignore their existence - a tactic which only exacerbates the problem when the Captain puts the ghosts onto a war footing. Meanwhile, Mike's attempts to turn the house into a home leads to a DIY disaster, saddling Lady Button with an ill-suited roommate, and Julian learns about his questionable legacy when the spooks discover the internet. Comedy, starring Charlotte Ritchie, Kiell Smith-Bynoe and Simon Farnaby